Grand Finale

A/N: This is a little vignette I wrote during "Once in a Lifetime" senior year. That was the first play I'd done with an actual character, and so I enjoyed getting inside the head of Miss May Daniels. The side effect of that was that she was in my head, too. This takes place, I imagine, as May is getting ready to leave Hollywood after George has made the wrong movie and Jerry has turned out to be an asshat. So, after the scene where George and I get fired and I do the thing with the clapboard, but before the train rant scene with Lawrence Vail. Marten might remember, though I doubt any of the rest of you will. Oh, well. I like this anyway. What the hell, for old time's sake: TWO THOUSAND AEROPLANES!

***

Who says we gave up the act, huh? This whole thing was an act, a brand-new comic-tragic spectacle brought to you by the Hyland-Daniels-Lewis team. Flawless. Our best yet, really. Never missed a beat.

Jerry sure played his part perfectly. God, he almost had me fooled. But the whole thing was never anything but an act, and I was always on. I knew the plan was just another act from the very beginning, I had that figured out. I didn’t know everything else was an act, too, for Jerry. Not at first. But I figured that out too, pretty damn quick. I’m pretty clever, you know, a bright girl. And I know how to put on a show. I know all about it.

The problem is, this is real life. It’s not a show, and you can’t turn up the lights and all come out and bow at the end. Or who knows? Maybe you can. So come on out, Jerry Hyland, and take a bow. Show’s over. You hear anybody cheering? Well, I’ll cheer for you. You’re the best goddamn showman in the business. And good luck to you.

Sorry I’m not game for it anymore. Consider this my grand finale, if you want. It just doesn’t seem like innocent fun to me anymore, I guess. See, you hurt me, Jerry. You really did. And I’d be crazy to stick around and let you know it.

So, see you around, Jerry. It’s been swell. Now it’s over. Goodbye.

Just… goodbye, okay, Jerry?



Once in a Lifetime belongs to George "S." Kaufman and Moss "Roxie" Hart. I mean no infringement and make no profit. Please do not copy or republish Erin's work without her express written permission. Thank you!