Surrender Ch. 3: Coruscant II (Part 3: Reconciliation)

Anakin hadn't really been following the committee's debate until they'd started talking about Padmé. Now that they'd stopped, his attention waned again. He realized that he'd been gripping the hilt of his lightsaber, and wondered what exactly he'd been planning to do with it. He imagined himself drawing it on that paranoid idiot from Rodia, defending Padmé's honor—that would at least have been amusing, if not entirely appropriate. Surely they must be wrong in saying that public opinion held that Padmé had had a hand in starting the war. No one who knew her could possibly believe that. And if they did, if Aak and the others were right about what the holonet was reporting, then that just proved that all politicians were less than worthless. All except the Chancellor and Padmé. And, for the sake of disputing Obi-Wan's general opinion of Senators, perhaps a few others—Organa, for instance, seemed tolerable.

Although he only glanced at her occasionally to avoid attracting her notice, Anakin noted that Padmé wasn't paying attention either, although she concealed it well. Every now and then she would glance up at whoever was speaking, but she wasn't seeing them, and she wasn't hearing anything. He wished he knew what she was seeing. She never looked in his direction.

The debate went on.

"What if we were to convince systems which could be leaving now to stay?" Lexi Dio asked. "Surely that is a purpose worth remaining active for."

"Dis is true," Jar Jar agreed. “More systems leavin’, ‘tis mui mui bombad for all of ussens. Needin’ more support.”

"Let them leave," said Ask Aak. "Our army does not depend on the number of star systems in our control."

Horox Ryyder shook his voluminous head. "Resources. We must have their resources."

Orn Free Taa and Ronet Coorr concurred.

"Our key function would be morale, you mark my words," said Onaconda Farr.

"One of them, certainly," Organa conceded. "And that is no bad thing. But above all we must bring a swift conclusion to this war."

"That is out of our hands," Ister Paddie answered. "Our troops arrive here shortly. It will be up to them."

Palpatine's eyes, Anakin noticed, had come to rest on Padmé. Undoubtedly he had noticed her lack of attention, too, and now wished to recall it.

"Senator Amidala, what is your opinion in this matter?"

Becoming aware of the eyes on her, Padmé looked up. At first, Anakin thought that she would have to ask the Chancellor to repeat his question. He observed that, for an instant, she met his eyes before fixing them steadily on Palpatine.

She said, very quietly, "I want to go home.”

The delegates stared. But Padmé, seeming not to notice, calmly addressed Palpatine in the formal manner of a Senator. "Chancellor, I request a leave of absence from the Senate to return to Naboo, effective immediately."

"Your request is granted," Palpatine answered, caught off guard.

"Thank you." Abruptly she rose and exited the apartment.

The Senators stared after her, then looked at one another, bewildered. On another day Anakin would have followed her without hesitation, but after the events of the night before he wasn't sure that he'd be welcome. He waited, therefore, until Palpatine looked up at him and said, "Jedi Skywalker, would you escort Senator Amidala back to her quarters?"

"Certainly, Chancellor." Amid muted Senatorial voices murmuring things like "delayed post-traumatic reaction, only to be expected," Anakin strode out after Padmé.

He spotted her walking quickly toward the end of the hall. Even as he increased his pace to catch up with her, though, she stopped and stood still, her back to him. It wasn't until he was directly behind her that he noticed her shoulders shaking. She was crying.

He reached out and touched her arm with his left hand, the living one. "Padmé—"

She pulled away. “Why did you follow me?”

“To escort you back to your room,” he replied, not bothering to hide how he resented her continued coldness. “You’ll want to prepare for your journey back to Naboo.”

He heard her breath catch as she struggled to compose herself, and his heart melted. He couldn’t be angry with her when she was like this.

“You shouldn’t travel back alone. I can arrange for someone from the Order to accompany you,” he murmured uncomfortably.

She turned and looked up at him, wiping away the tears on her cheeks.

"Anakin," her voice was breaking, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Ani… What I said… I didn't mean…" And suddenly she was in his arms, sobbing. "Please don't leave me."

"I won't," Anakin answered immediately, stunned. Any bitterness remaining from the night before vanished in an instant. "I could never."

"I'm sorry. I love you.” She clung to him tightly. “I don’t want to lose you."

"It's all right. I'm here." He wasn't sure what to do or say, so he tried to soothe her through the Force. Yet it was hard, because all he was able to concentrate on was the one thought, She needs me. It had never occurred to him before, and the very idea astonished him. She needs me just as much as I need her. After a moment, she began to calm down, and he leaned in to gently kiss her.

"Let's go home, Ani," she said softly. "Take me home to Naboo."

He promised that he would.

Late that afternoon, Anakin found Obi-Wan in a meditation chamber of the Jedi Temple. The older Jedi opened his eyes as his padawan took a seat opposite him.

"Where have you been today?"

"I was speaking with Senator Amidala. I leave for Naboo tomorrow. She wishes to return home as soon as possible, and I've told her I have permission to escort her."

"Very well." Obi-Wan eyed him closely. "You cannot stay there too long."

"I know, Master."

"A week, perhaps. Not much more."

"Yes, Master."

Obi-Wan sighed, resigned. "Be careful, Anakin."

The padawan nodded and closed his eyes to meditate. He hadn't wanted to leave Padmé's apartment to return here. He wouldn't want to leave Naboo after a week. Forever there, with her, would not be long enough. But he was not in the mood to argue. He wanted to meditate, to reflect. Finding Padmé in tears in the hallway had left him feeling stunned and helpless. Together they had been through so much, shared so much, and yet he realized… before today, he had never seen her cry.


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